


On What It Means To Love And Be Loved

by NerdyBirdy6602



Category: Dimension 20 (Web Series)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Canon Autistic Character, Canon Bisexual Character, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/F, First Fight, Garthy O'Brien Is A Great Dad, Insecure Ayda Aguefort, Light Angst, Other, Overwhelmed Figueroth Faeth, Post-sophomore year
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-06
Updated: 2020-12-06
Packaged: 2021-03-09 20:27:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 11,090
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27922234
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NerdyBirdy6602/pseuds/NerdyBirdy6602
Summary: Fig thought the worst of her high school experiences would be fighting the Nightmare King. She thought nothing could be worse than watching her worst fears come to life around her. While that was terrifying, at least she knew what her goal was. At least she knew where she was going. There was a physical manifestation of all her fears to fight. These days, she felt overwhelmed and miserable as the many parts of her life were starting to converge.Or Fig Faeth has a hard time admitting when she needs help, and ends up hurting those she loves because of it.
Relationships: Ayda Aguefort & Garthy O'Brien, Ayda Aguefort/Figueroth Faeth, Figueroth Faeth & Gorthalax the Insatiable, Figueroth Faeth & Jawbone O'Shaughnessey, Figueroth Faeth & Sandralynn Faeth, Sandralynn Faeth/Garthy O'Brien/Jawbone O'Shaughnessey (background), Sandralynn Faeth/Jawbone O'Shaughnessey
Comments: 10
Kudos: 26





	On What It Means To Love And Be Loved

**Author's Note:**

> Welcome back to my Figayda obsession. Special thanks to my best friend m3rcut10 for encouraging it and listening to me ramble about how ridiculously long this fic is.

_Figueroth Faeth_

Fig thought the worst of her high school experiences would be fighting the Nightmare King. She thought nothing could be worse than watching her worst fears come to life around her. While that was terrifying, at least she knew what her goal was. At least she knew where she was going. There was a physical manifestation of all her fears to fight. These days, she felt overwhelmed and miserable as the many parts of her life were starting to converge.

After spring break, which wasn’t much of a break at all, the Bad Kids had to return to Aguefort to finish off sophomore year. She had to start worrying about grades and assignments for the sake of her parents, even if she had never personally worried about such things before. Ayda, at least, made things bearable and helped her study whenever she could. Still, her girlfriend was busy keeping the Compass Points Library intact, so she couldn’t always ask for Ayda’s assistance.

Then there was the issue of the Bottomless Pit, which had become hers while Gorthalax had been trapped in the ruby. He did resume his rightful place, but no one in Hell acknowledged him as the Archdevil. Fig had been the one to take the power as her own and the only way to upheave that was for Gorthalax to kill her or capture her in a gem. She had offered herself to be captured, but that was vetoed immediately.

“That’s powerful magic, Fig,” Gorthalax had said. “If we fuck it up, I don’t want you to get hurt.”

So Fig had to make the occasional visit to the Nine Hells when things got rowdy. Gorthalax handled most of the paperwork himself, but sometimes her official status was necessary to keep things in order. She was happy to get it done, and honestly thought it was badass, but it did get exhausting sometimes.

There was also her band to worry about. Fig and The Cig Figs needed new music to put on a concept album in order to make her label happy. With a new muse in her life, music flowed from her more effortlessly than it ever had before. But even with the new onset of inspiration, sometimes it just felt like there weren’t enough hours in the day to write and practice and record in addition to her other responsibilities. She loved what she did, but she didn’t want to be forced into rushing her work.

And then there was the blossoming relationship she had with the one and only Ayda Aguefort, which was perhaps the least stressful thing in her life. Ayda visited Mordred Manor often to have dinner with the family, which was nice in and of itself. They also went on dates, both in Leviathan and Solace. She loved the half-phoenix girl with all her heart, but relationships took effort too. Fig was still struggling with the idea of being herself in romantic situations. She didn’t like herself the way Ayda absolutely adored her. Sometimes it was too much, too fast, and without enough time to think.

Today was one of those days where Fig felt like the world was caving in around her. Her manager had been calling her since she woke up this morning asking for when she could come into the studio. She had plans to go to Hell this evening in order to settle a slowly mounting rebellion that Gorthalax couldn’t handle himself. On top of all that, she had a test today that she had forgotten about and never studied for. When she got to lunch and sat at their usual table, her friends looked like they were walking on eggshells around her.

“You alright over there? You seem… off,” Fabian asked softly, no tracing of mocking in his tone at all. He’d gotten better at genuinely caring for his friends and Fig appreciated it on days where she didn’t feel like a hot mess, but today was not that day. “If you’re worried about the test, I’m sure you’ll be able to balance it out with a better grade in something else if it isn’t good..”

“I guess,” she muttered, pushing around the lunch slop on her tray. “I think I’m just tired.”

“You look like it,” Adaine stated, and then frowned. “Sorry. That was rude, but you do look unwell.”

Fig groaned, and then rubbed her temples in a manner that she had gotten used to these past few months. She knew she hadn’t been sleeping well, that much was true. She spent multiple all-nighters doing work, often managing to stay awake with enough coffee in her bloodstream. Even Riz got more sleep on a regular basis than her.

“I’ll make it work,” she mumbled. “I’ll use the weekend to take some time off. Recharge, y’know?”

The group seemed to nod and take the cue to shift the conversation in another direction. Fig was listening, but only just. She didn’t eat either since she was too busy shooting emails to her manager, her label, and her publicist. When the bell rang for next period, it caught her by surprise. Grumbling to herself, she shut off her crystal, dumped her barely-touched lunch, and trudged off to her next class. She felt the eyes of her friends at her back once more, but ignored them.

When Sandra Lynn pulled up to pick her up at the end of the day, Fig met her greeting with silence. She violently threw her bag in the backseat and buckled her seatbelt. Her mother was looking at her with obvious confusion, but didn’t directly comment on her attitude. Fig trained her gaze on trees that whizzed by her passenger’s side window.

“Do you want to go to Basrar’s? Get some ice cream?”

Fig was tempted, but shook her head and mumbled, “Don’t have enough time. I have to get my homework done before I go to the Bottomless Pit. Plus, I promised Ayda I’d demo some of the new songs I’ve been workshopping.”

Sandra Lynn sighed. Softly, she offered, “How about playing hooky tomorrow?”

Fig raised an eyebrow at that, fully turning to look at her mother. “Since when do you want me to skip school? You get pissed when I skip classes. Now you’re encouraging it?”

“Honey,” Sandra Lynn started and then paused, deep in thought . “You know you can talk to me, right? If you feel like things are too much, no one would blame you. You’ve got a lot on your plate lately.”

Fig’s temper flared as she felt like her mother was chastising her. Frustrated, she seethed, “What, you think I can’t handle it? Huh?”

“What? No, Fig, I’m just worried about—”

“Well maybe you should stop worrying,” Fig shouted, feeling her face grow red as her anger swelled. “I’m fucking fine. I don’t need you to tell me I can’t deal with this, because I can.”

Whatever Sandra Lynn tried to answer was lost on her as they pulled into the driveway. With the car still slowly pulling up, Fig snatched her bag and leapt out of the car. She stumbled, but slammed the door behind her as she burst into Mordred Manor. The first face she saw was Jawbone’s, who seemed to immediately know that Fig wasn’t very happy.

Raising his hands in mock surrender, he said, “I’m not gonna ask, kiddo. You know where to find me if you need me.”

Fig gave a curt nod and stormed past him and up to her room. The fire burning in her chest settled slightly at Jawbone’s open invitation. Still, she slammed her bedroom door hard enough to make the old house quake. Faintly, she could hear her mother talking with Jawbone.

“I don’t get it,” she groaned, sounding not angry, but rather lost. “I thought we’d gotten better at the whole talking thing. Things were looking up!”

“I know, honey,” he soothed, probably rubbing her back or pressing a kiss to her forehead. “She’s probably just in a bad place right now. It just happens, and it’s no one’s fault, Sandra Lynn.”

“I keep feeling like I’m doing something wrong.”

Fig felt her eyes start to sting with tears. Great, just fucking great. She’d not only thrown a fit like the child she tried to convince everyone she wasn’t, but she also managed to hurt her mom’s feelings yet again. She was angry at herself, and the world, and also at her mother. Fig knew she would have to apologize, but right now she didn’t even want to. She didn’t want to think about how she hurt those she touched, so she turned her focus to the work in her backpack.

Her bard classes were easy enough. That was something she had practiced in her adventures. She was ahead of everyone there, since many of them didn’t have the experience she did. The barbarian class that she observed with Gorgug also didn’t bother her much. They worked together on the assignments more often than not. Porter often told her that she might not have the strength of a barbarian, but she did have the spirit. Even though she still didn’t trust the man completely, it was good to hear. She had started dabbling in warlock classes, however, and those brought their own problems. Sure, she was already a magic caster, but things worked differently. She was gaining new powers that she didn’t completely understand, and none of the Bad Kids had this class in common. So, she struggled her way through via willpower and the internet. Tonight's work was difficult, but that was fine. It just meant she didn’t have to think about anything else.

A few hours passed as she worked on the day’s assignments until Adaine came knocking at her door. She didn’t enter, but instead asked through the door, “Jawbone said dinner is ready, and that I should come get you. I think he made your favorite.”

Fig felt her stomach growl. Skipping lunch wasn’t her best choice and she felt the headache resulting from it pounding like a bass drum at her temples. She looked at her work, and then at the door, before heaving a sigh and answering, “Can’t right now. Tell them to save me a plate?”

She could feel Adaine’s hesitation through the door before she offered, “Ayda told me she’s coming over for dinner tonight. She seemed excited to see you.”

Fig huffed, taking in the new information. She missed Ayda so, so much, even if she’d seen her just yesterday. Today felt like an eternity long, and her girlfriend was often the best cure for her anxieties. Still, she considered how well Ayda read her, as if she was one of her books at the Compass Points Library. Ayda would know that she hasn’t been taking care of herself, and thus would worry needlessly. She liked to fix things, but Fig didn’t need to be fixed. She just needed time.

“Fig?”

“Tell her I’m sorry,” Fig answered. “But I have some things to take care of. She’ll understand.”

Fig knew Adaine waited at the door for a long while, probably expecting her to change her mind after a moment. When she didn’t speak up, she heard a sigh from the other side of the door and light footsteps heading downstairs. Fig felt like bashing her head against the wall, and almost said fuck it and went downstairs. Instead, she returned to her warlock assignment and ignored the rumble in her stomach.

The next sounds she heard were in the hall once more, with the very familiar sound of talons clicking against the hardwood floor. She heard them come closer and then recede, going downstairs to dine with the rest of the family. Fig released a breath she didn’t know she was holding, and turned her focus back to the task at hand. Her mind was attempting to wander, but she didn’t have time for that.

She wasn’t sure how long it had been, but another knock came at the door. Her eyes darted to the door, but she shook her head and remained silent. The knock came again, and she still ignored it. Fig tried to convince herself that she didn’t care who was behind that door.

“Figueroth,” Ayda called, a hesitant tone to her voice. Fig felt herself melt at the sound, and even a small smirk had grown on her lips. “I brought you a plate, but Adaine had mentioned you were busy working. I understand the ways of long study sessions, and I do not wish to interrupt. Would you like me to leave it outside your door?”

Fig felt her resolve melt at the sweet sound of her girlfriend on the other side. She tried, really and truly, to deny her, but felt uneasy at the thought. So, with a rasp still remaining from her shouting match with her mother, she answered, “No, you can come in if you’d like.”

Ayda opened the door quickly, peering in and beaming at her. In a teasing tone, which was a relatively new development for the usually serious young woman, she trilled, “I would like to come in, thank you.”

She shut the door behind her, holding out a plate piled with a dish that Sandra Lynn must’ve had a hand in. It had been her favorite dish since she was a kid, but she hadn’t had it since, at least, before she knew Jawbone. When Ayda set the plate on her desk, Fig set aside the nearly-finished warlock homework and started eating.

“You’re eating like a creature that hasn’t had a meal in days,” Ayda commented, making herself at home on the edge of the bed. Fig knew she wasn’t judging, but she suddenly felt self-conscious. As Ayda watched her eating slow, she amended, “I’m concerned you’re not taking care of yourself is what I meant.”

Fig rolled her eyes, swallowing the food in her mouth before muttering, “You and every other person I talk to.”

Ayda hummed at that, seeming to understand that she didn’t want to talk about it. Still, the phoenix girl seemed pensive as she watched Fig eat. Although she usually encouraged Ayda to speak her mind, this time the tiefling simply ate her meal. So, she let the tense silence grow between them, knowing her girlfriend didn’t do things as mundane as small talk. Fig had gone from thrilled to anxious in the span of a few minutes and all she could think about was that it’s her own fault.

“I have the overwhelming sense that you are upset,” Ayda stated softly, standing when Fig was done with her meal and turning the desk chair around so they were facing each other. “Am I correct, or is this something else?”

Fig stared into those eyes that flickered like candlelight and took a shaky breath in. She felt like crying and was ready to tell her about everything: Her shitty week, her overwhelming responsibilities… Everything that had been bothering her was on the tip of her tongue. Instead, in true Fig Faeth style, she averted her gaze and changed the subject.

“Just tired,” Fig lied smoothly, putting on a bright grin. “I think I promised you some demos for the songs going on the concept album.”

Ayda looked confused at the sudden change in mood. The flame atop her head, rather than flaring like it did when she was excited, seemed to dim like the wind had hit it. Ayda looked as though she was about to start casting, and then pouted hopelessly. Quietly, she asked, “Can you be truthful with me, please, and speak plainly? I don’t have the spell slot available for Ayda’s Comprehend Context.”

Fig blinked, startled for a moment. She was supposed to be the one explaining things to Ayda, not making them more confusing. The hurt in her girlfriend’s eyes and the realization that she was being lied to made her feel as though someone had run a sword through Fig’s heart. She clenched her fists to keep them from shaking before she explained, “I’m sorry, babe. That wasn’t fair of me. I haven’t been sleeping well. I haven’t been eating well or enough. There’s just so much to do that I don’t feel like I have the time anymore.”

“Forgiven,” Ayda said immediately, and then processed the rest of what she said. “I see. Figueroth, have you considered that you might have too many things going on at once?”

“That’s not the problem,” Fig snapped, perhaps harsher than she had intended. _Too late,_ she thought. _The words are already out there._ Then, aloud, she explained, “I just need to work on dealing with it better. I’m adjusting. There’s nothing wrong with that.”

Ayda seemed stunned at the suddenly irritated words and took a step away, just to give her love some space. She took a deep breath to steady herself, and then replied, “That is the truth: There is nothing wrong with making adjustments. I merely meant that it might make your life easier if you collaborated with someone else in order to get some tasks out of the way. Have you spoken to anyone about feeling overwhelmed, besides myself?”

Fig groaned, flopping onto a bean bag chair in the corner of the room. She shook her head no, and gripped her horns with her hands. The tiefling girl watched as her girlfriend approached and sat on the floor across from her. At least she hadn’t scared her off. Defeated, she muttered, “I’m not overwhelmed. I’ll make it work. I really don’t want to talk about this. Can we just drop it?”

“So no, you have not spoken to anyone else on the matter,” Ayda deduced. The phoenix girl gave a frown, clearly not pleased with the idea. Her eyes were pleading as she whispered, “Figueroth, I only want to help you. You know you only have to ask, yes?”

Something inside Fig Faeth snapped. Her friends, her mother, and now her girlfriend were all just trying to help her, but she didn’t need all these people worrying about her. These things were her struggles, not anyone else’s. The last thing she wanted was for anyone to think of her as something that needed repair. These were her burdens to bear. She especially couldn’t expect Ayda, the beautiful and resplendent wizard who would flood the Nine Hells on her behalf, to worry about Fig’s minor issues.

“I don’t want your help! I don’t need your help! Not everyone is a project for you to fix, Ayda.”

As soon as the words left her mouth in a fitful scream, she knew they were exactly the wrong ones to say. The look of betrayal and fear that crossed Ayda’s face, even for the slightest moment, said that was the worst possible thing she could say. She watched as her girlfriend rose to her feet, her face stoney and difficult to read. There was a long moment of silence before she spoke.

“Very well,” Ayda assured in a monotone voice. “I’ll be going. When you want company, you know where to find me.”

Ayda practically ran out of Fig’s room, but still took care to close the door gently behind her. And Figueroth Faeth, in all of her anger and frustration, screamed loudly before weeping at the unfairness of it all.

_Ayda Aguefort_

“Very well,” Ayda heard herself saying in her best attempt at a normal, unaffected voice. The pounding of her heart, the sweat on her palms, all told otherwise but she hid those symptoms of nervousness as best as she could. “I’ll be going. When you want company, you know where to find me.”

She tried to take her time walking out of the room, but found her anxiety pushing her forward. Figueroth didn’t want her here. Her very own paramour didn’t enjoy her presence. What was she supposed to make of that? Had they already fallen out of love? Judging by the sharp pain in her heart, Ayda knew that wasn’t the case for herself. She didn’t even have the heart to be angry at her. She simply felt hurt and betrayed.

Ayda, not paying attention to where she was walking, ran directly into Jawbone. The werewolf gave a small grunt, but looked at her with genuine concern. She could never begin to understand why, but she knew by the look on his face that he knew she was upset. Ayda thought she had perfected hiding her emotions. Still, she supposed her normal methods wouldn’t work against a professional counselor.

“Ayda? Kiddo, are you in there somewhere?”

Ayda’s eyes snapped to meet him in an instant, focusing on the conversation at hand. He had asked her something, and she was uncharacteristically not paying attention. That was an easy sign that there was something wrong with her. It might be best to blame her emotional state on something else, then, rather than claiming she wasn’t upset at all. Already, she was pulling up the script in her mind that got her out of uncomfortable situations.

“Present,” she said after a second’s hesitation, letting her gaze fall on the door that led her back to the Compass Points Library. “My apologies for running into you, Jawbone. It was not my intention. Something urgent has arisen at the library, and my presence is needed as soon as possible.”

“Are you in some kind of trouble, Ayda? If you need an extra set of hands, I’m here,” Jawbone offered, still looking worried. The phoenix girl shook her head instinctively.

“Rawlins has used a Sending spell to inform me there are some unruly pirates making a mess of the Compass Points,” she lied smoothly, playing the perfect picture of a merely concerned librarian rather than heartbroken lover. “I would hate for any of my prized collections to be destroyed. I apologize for leaving so abruptly.”

“You do what you have to,” he answered with a reassuring smile. “And Mordred Manor will welcome you back when you’re done. Good night, Ayda.”

“Thank you. Good night,” she answered softly, before calmly walking back through the door. 

Once she managed to gently shut it behind her, she felt the facade crack and crumble around her. Her panic and anxiety consumed her as if she were the fuel of a fire. Her wings curled around her in a protective cocoon, and Ayda found that she couldn’t breathe. In her fear and unease, she used the Sending spell to deliver a message to Garthy O’Brien.

_Feeling unwell. Need some help. May I come to the Gold Gardens? Do not let me interrupt if you are busy. Not that important._

The response that came to her mind was an immediate one, and it felt like everything she needed to hear as Garthy’s voice whispered, _You’re always welcome here, lovey. There’s no business that would be more important than your wellbeing. Please teleport to my quarters at your earliest convenience._

Ayda took a deep breath. Rising to her feet, she began to slowly restructure the mask she so often wore. She wasn’t sure if Garthy had a partner currently in their room, and she would rather not scare whoever that might be. Regaining her composure, she teleported directly outside their room. Immediately, she felt the warmth and protection of the Gold Gardens surround her. She breathed in the inherent magic of this place. It was familiar and brought her many fond memories.

The two guards at their door smiled at her, knowing very well that she would always be welcome here. They greeted her and opened the door for her, allowing her to see a very concerned, but still calm, Garthy. Their expression said clearly that they were happy to see Ayda, even if it was under these circumstances.

“You’re not to let anyone else in under any circumstances, lovies,” Garthy instructed. “Unless someone is dead or dying, and even then Cullen can manage it, I’m sure.”

They both nodded solemnly, giving Ayda clear space to enter. She stepped inside the very comforting, plush room. It was, perhaps, too ornate for her tastes. Nevertheless, it felt like home. She heard the door close behind her and nearly jumped out of her skin, letting out an embarrassingly loud squawk. Ayda found herself looking down at her talons, rather than at the half-orc in front of her. She still felt their eyes on her, and knew she couldn’t avoid this conversation. Afterall, she was the one to request their company.

“The room is soundproof as always, sweetheart,” they said quietly. “Anything you say here will not be heard by another living soul, I promise you. Come sit on the bed with me.”

Ayda did as requested, still not looking directly into their eyes. She felt shame rise in her chest as she recalled Figueroth’s outburst. Had she pushed too hard? Said too much? Would her paramour even want to see her again after this? She felt the mask start crumbling again, but tried to stop it this time.

“I think I did a bad thing, Garthy,” she rasped, feeling a lump form in her throat. “An irreparably bad thing.”

“Oh Ayda,” they purred, pulling the young girl into their lap so that her head was against their chest. “I sincerely doubt that whatever damage you’ve done is beyond fixing, lovey. Still, we’re all creatures liable to make mistakes once in a while. Whatever happened, I’m here for you, always. Talk to me.”

She tried to speak properly and articulate her thoughts. Ayda stuttered through her first few syllables before huffing in frustrated anguish. Garthy waited so patiently too, and perhaps that was what led to the mask finally falling. Her face crumpled as she stared into her adoptive parent’s forgiving gaze. Then, without further warning, she pressed her face against the golden runes of their chest and weeped.

Long, hiccupping sobs fell from her lips. She felt Garthy making small, nonsense shushing sounds as they rubbed her back. Ayda only cried harder, wrapping her arms around their middle and squeezing tight enough to reasonably be uncomfortable, but not enough to hurt them. She’d never forgive herself if she hurt someone else.

“I’m here,” Garthy purred into her ear. “Let it out, sweetheart. I’m not going anywhere. You are always, always, my priority. When you feel ready to speak, I’d never shame you, lovey… Not in my lifetime or any of yours.”

Ayda sniffled, feeling her own breath become choppy and uneven. The hiccups came between gasps for breath. She fidgeted her hands as the discomfort became unbearable. The fidgets became gestures, and so she tapped on Garthy’s chest right above their heart. They must have understood, because Ayda suddenly found herself laying atop Garthy with her ear positioned in just the right way so that she could hear their even breaths.

“Easy, lovey,” they cooed, rubbing her back. “Follow my breathing. I promise it’ll help.”

Her breathing stuttered and faltered as she took a deep breath in. Closing her eyes, Ayda let them hold her tight. It was comforting to feel the pressure against her back and to run her hand against the smooth skin of Garthy’s arm. It felt much colder than her own skin, but she felt like she was about to turn into nothing but ashes and embers so the temperature difference was calming rather than uncomfortable.

“Good girl,” Garthy purred gently. “Excellent work as always, darling. I’m so proud of you.”

Ayda gave a quiet chirp in reply, pressing her cheek against the golden runes of their chest. She remembered doing this as a child, letting her guardian come and comfort her whenever she got frustrated. They were so good at knowing her triggers and tics that she hardly even needed to point them out anymore. It was comforting to know that someone knew her so well that she barely needed to speak. It felt like home. It felt like love.

“I feel very tired,” she admitted softly, and it was true. A yawn spilled from her lips shortly after her words, and she knew that these emotions tended to drain her. “But I owe you an explanation.”

They shake their head. “You owe me absolutely nothing. Tell me when you’re ready, sweetheart. I’ll be here as long as you need me too. If you need rest, then rest.”

Ayda hesitated, but shook her head. “I want to tell you first, and I want to stay here. For now. Is this proper?”

Garthy chuckles, kissing her forehead. She felt a golden, protective rune sprout on her forehead. She wasn’t sure if they had done this on purpose. Magic could often be reflexive; an impulse. Ayda needed to be protected, and thus their magic obeyed their unspoken command. Softly, they assured her, “It is proper if that is what you need. You needn’t worry about that, lovey. My love, my time, and my presence are yours as long as you’ll have me.”

Ayda nodded slowly, and then mumbled quietly, “I upset Figueroth. I’m not entirely sure what I have done to hurt her, but she is very angry. I think I overstepped a boundary.”

Garthy frowned,seemingly confused. Ayda was always careful, especially in this blossoming relationship she had going. Still, they answered, “Tell me as much about the situation as you think is right for you to share.”

The story bubbled out from her in waves. “I went to Mordred Manor early this evening for dinner, as I often do. I went with the intention that Figueroth would come to the table and she did not. Her mother and Jawbone, who were worried about her overwhelming responsibilities as of late, politely requested that I send up a plate for her. Adaine mentioned she was too busy during lunch at my father’s academy to eat. I didn’t want my paramour to starve, so I sent up a plate. I asked, very politely as I always do, if I could enter. The family had told me she was studying, and you know that I believe knowledge is a sacred art. If I were to interrupt that and break her concentration, I would never forgive myself.”

“It sounds like you haven’t done anything wrong thus far,” Garthy commented kindly, kissing her cheek. “Lovey, it sounded like you took a great deal of care into making sure you were welcome.”

Ayda didn’t respond to the praise, and instead carried on. “She seemed frustrated when I walked in, but not at me. She just seemed… angry at everything. Figueroth still welcomed me very warmly at first, until I mentioned that she looked like she had not been taking care of herself as well as she should have.”

Garthy winced, thinking of the many ways someone could misconstrue that if they didn’t understand her bluntness. Calmly, they asked, “And how exactly did you address that, lovey?”

“‘I’m concerned you’re not taking care of yourself,’” she parroted to the letter, copying the exact tone at which she said it. “Why? Was that the wrong thing to say in that situation?”

Garthy shook their head. “Actually, that’s the nicest possible way you could have said that. Color me impressed, darling.”

“Then she diverted the conversation, and I asked her to speak plainly. Normally I would use Adaine’s very kind gift, Ayda’s Understand Subtext spell, but I didn’t have the spell slot,” Ayda explained. “She mentioned that my observations were correct and… I asked if she had asked for any help or at least discussed her feelings. Jawbone tells me that this is the most healthy way of dealing with my feelings, so I thought that would be applicable to Figueroth as well.”

Garthy hummed, feeling they could imagine what happened next. “Jawbone truly has grown wise. Yes, darling, that’s a very good way to approach unwanted feelings. Is this when she got upset?”

Ayda nodded. “I offered my own assistance, and she found that to be very insulting. She… didn’t want or need my help.”

The phoenix girl felt the tears steaming in her eyes. The words echoed in her mind like alarm bells. She knew, even if she could resolve this argument, she would think about those words for weeks. Ayda didn’t realize how violently she had started shaking until Garthy pulled a blanket, which was fire resistant, over both of them.

“Easy, lovey,” Garthy whispered. “You’re with me. No one here is upset with you.”

Ayda sniffled. “‘Not everyone is a project for you to fix, Ayda.’ That is what she told me. I wasn’t trying to fix her! She is the vision of perfection. Nothing in my wildest dreams could conjure up a paramour—a person—more perfect than Figueroth Faeth. I just wanted to help her. I have seen the way she appears to be so miserable lately. Figueroth doesn’t deserve that.”

Garthy sighed, their suspicions from the start confirmed. “Ayda, sweetheart, you haven’t done anything wrong. The way you speak about her, even after she hurt you, tells me how admirable your intentions were. Sometimes people lash out without regard for who they’re hurting because, for the moment, they’re just so angry.”

She took those words and mulled over them a bit. Her lip wobbled, but no tears came. She tried to make sense of being scolded without deserving it. When she was younger, pirates scolded her for her bluntness, or for believing she was foolish for not understanding. No one had ever scolded her for being kind. It didn’t seem logical, or reasonable, to punish a positive thing.

“That’s not fair,” she argued, her voice cracking on the last word. “I had to have pushed an unspoken boundary. Garthy, it has to be my fault. Figueroth would never hurt me on purpose. She would _never_!”

“Ayda, darling,” Garthy whispered, pressing a kind hand to her cheek. “I’m sure she wasn’t intentionally trying to hurt you… not really. Figueroth probably just wanted someone to hurt that wasn’t her. You were there, so you took the brunt of it. You’re right though, that’s not fair.”

“Is it reasonable to be angry?”

They sighed, but nodded. “Whatever you feel is reasonable, sweetheart. Fights happen between even the best of partners. It’s the healing that happens afterwards that leads to a better, stronger couple.”

Ayda huffed, curling herself childishly into Garthy’s comforting hold. “I think I would like to be upset a little longer. May I stay here? Compass Points Library feels too big for the moment, even if that is meant to be my corner of Leviathan.”

The half-orc pulled the blanket taut over the both of them. “Of course you can, lovey. Would you like me to use Sending to give Rawlins a message on your behalf?”

She nodded, blinking owlishly and yawning. “Yes please. Tell him I’ll return tomorrow afternoon to ensure the Compass Point Library is operating effectively.”

Ayda heard Garthy cast the spell and dictate exactly what they were telling Rawlins through the haze of sleep that was slowly creeping over her. She embraced it and let herself succumb to her exhaustion as her guardian cradled her with a tender hand. 

_Figueroth Faeth_

Fig didn’t know how long she sat there wondering exactly how much damage she had caused, but she knew it took a long while for her to compose herself. A few knocked at the door, and she cast prestidigitation to make her voice say, “Leave me alone, I’m studying!” It felt familiar, yet simultaneously cruel, to return to lying. She had such a good streak of honesty going for so long after dating Ayda that she now felt dirty.

_And I’m sure Ayda will be so glad that you’ve used her biggest insecurities against her,_ she thought bleakly. _Welcome back to the Fig that destroys all that she touches. I knew you couldn't stay away for long._

The anger boiled inside of her, and she wondered if this is what Gorgug felt like before he flew into a Rage. Grumbling under her breath, she started gathering what she would need to fight the uprising in the Bottomless Pit. Maybe it wasn’t the healthiest way to deal with her emotions, but fucking shit up felt like exactly what she needed. Casting the ritual she had learned months ago to travel in between this plane and the next, she was gone in a flash and appeared at Gorthalax’s side. Apparently, he had been expecting her.

“Hey, Fig,” he greeted with an elated smile on his face. When his daughter didn’t return it, it began to dim. “What happened, kid?”

“Not the time,” she deflected, strapping on her bass guitar. “Point me in the direction of the uprising. I’m ready now.”

He eyed her warily, but the uprising was becoming quite the problem. The look told her that they would talk about this later, but she wasn’t about to focus on that. She watched as Gorthalax started walking towards the Pit, and she followed close behind. As they neared it, she made out the shape of countless minor demons who only wanted to cause chaos. Steeling herself, Fig started her reckless shredding to push them back into the pit. It worked on many of them, and she watched as they tumbled into an endless void.

Others bypassed the sheer force of the chords and charged her. Rather than doing the smart thing and retreating out of reach, she stood her ground against them. Gorthalax moved himself in front of her and made his own attacks, pushing even more of them back into the pit. As the demons neared, their claws made wide gashes across her chest. She gasped out in pain before letting out a rage-fueled scream and casting Hellish Rebuke on one of them. It didn’t do much damage to the hellion, but it was enough to make him turn tail and run.

Fig felt the wounds are her chest throb in time with every heartbeat. The lack of sleep these days seemed to have weakened her, and she felt herself sway slightly on her feet. She swore under her breath at the feeling, not wanting to go down before she could take out her frustrations. Casting another Thunderwave, she watched as some of the demons fell to their knees. In a moment of pure anger and frustration, she shoved her bass aside and started pummeling one of them with her fists. She knew she wasn’t very strong, but she wanted something to dull the pain of her own loss. As she broke loose on this unsuspecting soul, her thoughts drifted to Ayda.

Fig used her girlfriend’s greatest fear and weakness against her when she was only trying to help. Ayda was always a welcome presence in her life, and yet she had forced her to run out of… Fear? Anger? She couldn’t even begin to understand how Ayda felt in that moment or afterwards. She would soon realize she deserved better than Fig, surely. Ayda was a flame that lit the way for others, guiding them to being better and brighter people. Fig didn’t know how to do much with her own flame except destroy.

“Fig!”

She heard Gorthalax’s voice as though she was hearing it underwater. It was quiet enough to ignore, so she kept throwing punches wildly. What she couldn’t ignore was the strong arms pulling her back from the twitching demon before her. She tried to fight against the strong pull, her hands trying to pry his arms off. The most infuriating thing was that he wasn’t yelling at her for losing control. Gorthalax was simply shushing Fig and squeezing her tight.

“Let me go! Dad, fucking put me down! I wasn’t finished with him!”

“Let’s get you cleaned up, Fig,” was his only answer.

And so, squirming all the while, Fig was led back to the Archdevil’s estate. She fell limp, exhausting herself fully, by the time Gorthalax set her down in the living room. Her head was pounding now that the adrenaline had faded. She wasn’t even angry anymore. She was just tired; Tired of being pissed, tired of downplaying how she felt.

“Do you want to tell me what’s going on, kid? You don’t have to,” he offered as he took a clean rag to her blood-soaked skin. “You did a number on those demons, though.”

Fig sniffled, feeling hot tears come unbidden down her face. She took a moment to come to her senses before whimpering, “It’s just been a bad day, Dad. A really, really bad day. I’m sorry.”

“No, I’m sorry,” Gorthalax answered. “I’ve been asking a lot of you lately. Things just get restless here so often… But you have so much to be doing outside of here.”

“No, it’s fine,” she said with the slightest waver in her voice. Fig wiped at her eyes in order to hide the signs of her weakness before calmly stating, “I can take it. Please don’t be sorry. I’m getting better at handling it. Once I get the new album off the ground, I should be more free for things like this.”

Gorthalax doesn’t answer, instead taking to silently cleaning her up. The pity she saw in his eyes riled something dark in her, but with the memory of her conversation with Ayda, she didn’t act on it. The last thing she needed was to push everyone away. She made a big show of yawning and stretching before saying, “I should get going. I’ve got homework to finish.”

“I’ll take you home,” he replied, holding out a hand. “I wanted to see Sklonda anyway.”

“Gross,” Fig mumbled teasingly, giving her dad a weak smile as she nudged his shoulder. “Have fun.”

Gorthalax laughed, rolling his eyes at his darling daughter. Holding her hand to teleport, he admitted, “I’m just saying hello, Fig. It’s not like every time you see Ayda…”

His voice trailed off as Fig almost immediately burst into tears. She didn’t realize how close she was to breaking until she heard her girlfriend’s name. In a desperate attempt at hiding it, she buried her face in Gorthalax’s chest. She felt his arms immediately come up to surround her as she wept.

“Easy, kid,” he rasped, easily picking up his daughter. “That’s the kind of bad day you’re having, eh? It’s alright, Fig. Breathe. Dad’s gotcha.”

The comfort made her cry harder. Fig gripped him even tighter. Her breathing grew ragged and sharp as she tried to stop breaking down. She didn’t have the right to feel like this, not when she was the one to hurt Ayda. Who knew how the poor phoenix girl was dealing with being shouted at. They’d never had a fight like this before, so she had nothing to gauge it by.

“I hurt her,” she sobbed, pulling back. “I didn’t mean to. I didn’t mean to. I don’t want her to leave.”

“Oh, Fig,” Gorthalax soothed, petting her head in a way that reminded her of the way Gilear would when she was small. “It’ll work out, honey. People fight. It happens. Honestly, you’ll come out of it stronger as a couple. Give her time and space to figure out her own feelings, and maybe talk to your mom about eliminating some of your stresses so this doesn’t happen anymore.”

Fig started to shake her head, but Gorthalax interrupted her. “Fig, you can’t expect to deal with everything alone. You might have saved Spyre twice, but you’re still a kid. You’re allowed to be overwhelmed. I know you don’t hold everyone to that same standard. It isn’t childish to take some time for you. If anything, that’s probably the most mature thing you can do.”

She took the words in stride, finding herself nodding along with the advice. Looking back, she realized that asking someone for help might have saved her, and Ayda, the pain of right now. Fig sniffled and whispered, “I’ll keep that in mind. Thanks Dad. Can… Can we go home now?”

Gorthalax cast the spell, and they found themselves in front of Mordred Manor. Gently, he set her down and glanced at the door. Fig took the time to wipe her eyes and readied herself to confront her mom after having shouted at her in the car earlier.

“I’ll leave you to it,” he whispered. “Be good, kid. Love ya.”

“Love you too,” she said with a smile, watching as he teleported off again.

She stared at the front door for a long while, her feet planted firmly in place. It wasn’t fear that kept her there, but the anxiety of knowing the conversation she was going to have to have. Fig tried to plan out her words carefully, but decided instead in a moment of boldness to simply ring the doorbell.

Sandra Lynn opened it, watching Fig with a hesitant gaze. “Fig? What are you—”

Whatever her mother was going to say was lost on her as she leapt forward and hugged the woman tight. It reminded Fig of simpler times, before she knew of her own infernal heritage. When she was younger, she didn’t think the entire world deserved to be flipped off, least of all her own mother. That was the Fig without horns who was the perfect cheerleader and wore pretty pink dresses. She sometimes regretted her fierce rebellion and this moment, with Sandra Lynn’s arms wrapped around her waist, was one of them.

“I’m sorry,” she whispered, out of tears to cry but still very much emotional. “I’m sorry I yelled at you. I was just angry. Can we talk? Please, mom?”

She felt Sandra Lynn’s grip tighten around her. “Of course, honey. Come on inside and we can talk. I’m not angry. I promise I’m not. You just have me worried, Fig.”

Fig felt herself being led upstairs to her mom’s room, ignoring the low murmur of voices around her. She could tell they weren’t directed at her, but rather just the distinct chatter of a busy home. When they entered the room for some privacy, she heard Sandra Lynn ask, “Hey, do you think you could give us a minute?”

“Sure, sweetie,” said the familiar low rumble of Jawbone’s voice. “I’ll be in my office downstairs if you need me.”

“Actually,” Fig mumbled, finally looking up from the floor. “Can Jawbone stay? Is… that okay? Not weird?”

“Not weird,” Jawbone answered with a grin, sitting up on the bed. “C’mon, I said you could come talk when you were ready, right? Sandra Lynn, that's okay with you?”

Sandra Lynn shrugged, smiling at her partner with something akin to relief in her gaze. “The more the merrier, right? Here, Fig, up on the bed.”

The tiefling girl did as she was asked, climbing on the bed and crossing her legs. Sandra Lynn followed, sitting next to Jawbone and smiling warmly at Fig. Meeting her mom’s gaze, she suddenly felt embarrassed. Was this worth a heart-to-heart? Fig found herself nervously fiddling with her fingers.

“Hey,” Sandra Lynn murmured, holding out her hand to squeeze Fig’s. “I’m here for you, a hundred percent.”

And so Fig spilled everything on her mind, from the schoolwork stresses to the pressure from the label, to her duties in Hell. It came pouring out all at once, and she didn’t realize she had started crying again until Jawbone handed off a box of tissues. She used them to wipe her eyes and groaned as she added, “I said some really hurtful things to Ayda. Things that literally made her run out of the room. I’m a bad person.”

“No, Fig,” Jawbone soothed first. “You had a bad day, and you made a bad choice. Been there, done that, kiddo. It’s part of growing up.”

“You’re allowed to be a complex person,” Sandra Lynn chimed in. “Remember that? It works both ways, honey.”

“I’m exhausted,” Fig admitted. “Inside and out, but I think I need to fix this mess I’ve made first.”

“I don’t think that’s smart,” Jawbone said gently. “I’d like to suggest something, and you choose whether you take it or not. I’m not your parent, but I’d like to think we’re at least friends.”

“Duh,” Fig answered immediately, giggling. “You’re cool. Like, really cool.”

Jawbone laughed, winking at her. “Thanks, kiddo. Now, I’m suggesting that you make this weekend a mental health break for yourself. No manager, no archdevil duties, and no school tomorrow. If your mom’s okay with it, I’ll write a note saying that I deemed you “unwell” and someone can collect your work for you.”

“Works for me,” Sandra Lynn confirmed.

“And tomorrow, we can take a trip to Leviathan and see if Ayda wants to talk yet. Sometimes people need space to think after a fight, so you don’t want to crowd her,” Jawbone continued, still watching Fig carefully. “I’ve been meaning to talk to Garthy anyway.”

“Oh,” Fig replied, disheartened. She hadn’t considered the fact that she might not be able to fix that tonight. “Okay.”

“Honey, it’ll be okay,” Sandra Lynn assured. “I’ll call out tomorrow, and I might not be the Elven Oracle, but I sense a movie marathon in our future. We’ll make it fun. I just wish you’d talked to us earlier, Fig.”

“I thought I could handle it,” Fig mumbled, feeling tears in her eyes once again. “I didn’t want anyone else to have to deal with my problems.”

“Even if you can handle it, and I’m sure you can, you shouldn’t have to. You’re young, Fig. Now’s the time to have a little fun, before you get bogged down with too many responsibilities,” Jawbone pointed out.

For the first time, Fig took those words to heart. It felt good to be validated and to know that her stress wasn’t because she was weak. No one expected her to bear this on her own, and she felt weightless in her relief. The lack of expectations, at least for now, felt freeing. Besides, since when had she become the responsible Bad Kid? She’d leave that to Adaine for now.

“Okay,” she said, this time more confident. “I’ve earned a break. Do you think we could do a marathon tonight?”

Sandra Lynn chuckled, hopping off the bed with a ranger’s efficiency and kissing Fig’s forehead. “Only if it’s combined with a sleepover downstairs, okay? I’ll get the popcorn and maybe some hot cocoa together. You get whatever you need together and pick out a movie. Sounds good?”

Fig hugged her mom tight in this slightly awkward position where she had to tilt her head back in order to avoid hitting her mom with her horns. “Sounds great. Thanks, mom.”

The two remained in a silent embrace for a moment before her mother whispered, “I’m proud of you, Fig.”

“For what?”

“Being honest, even if it took some time. You’re doing better than I was at your age, and I had a lot less to deal with,” Sandra Lynn praised, and Fig took it with a faint blush on her cheeks. “That’s what I’m proud of, honey.”

Fig grinned, feeling tears build up in her eyes. For the first time in what felt like forever, they were happy tears. Fig Faeth felt like a new person without the weight of the world on her back. When she released her mother and went to prepare for a sleepover, something that Fig from a year ago would find super lame, she could only find hope and determination that told her that she would fix things with Ayda come tomorrow.

_Ayda Aguefort_

Ayda awoke in Garthy’s bed alone, with sun streaming through a break in the curtains. It took her a moment to recollect why she had slept here and not in her own quarters at the library, but her heart sank when she remembered. Her fight with Fig, her breakdown… The feeling of pure heartache crashed over her in waves, but she sighed. Garthy’s words, reminding her that she wasn’t at fault, gave her the strength to swing herself out of bed. Once she did, she found a note on the bed in Garthy’s hand that read: “Good morning, lovey! Sorry I couldn’t be there when you woke, but breakfast will be in the dining hall when you’re ready. Love you, sweetheart! ~Garthy”

She smiled softly at the kind note, carefully folding and pocketing it before leaving the bedroom. Two guards, different ones from the night before, greeted her with warm smiles. She waved, embarrassed to be caught so disheveled. Still, she knew she was in the presence of Garthy’s people, and therefore she was in the presence of friends.

As she walked through the Gold Gardens, she noticed that she could hear the click of her talons against the floor. The unusual quiet was very pleasant. Usually, Garthy didn’t have many guests until evening came. There were a few patrons, but they were quiet and very different from the rowdy, evening crowd that she avoided at all costs. It simply wasn’t her brand of fun, and she would much rather be at home with a good book than in here at its peak. Garthy knew that well and thankfully didn’t take it as a personal attack the first time she admitted it. They simply smiled and assured her that they could always provide a quiet room for her if she ever needed them.

And how true that was. Ayda felt the swell of gratitude in her chest as she remembered dropping in practically unannounced. Not once did she experience the sensory overload she had half expected from an evening here. She would have to thank Garthy once again for taking such good care of her.

Speaking of which, she found them sitting at the bar with a glass of rum in their hands. When they noticed her presence, their golden irises seemed to glow with excitement as a smile graced their lips. Ayda returned it, sitting beside them.

“Well good morning Miss. Ayda Aguefort,” they said teasingly. “I hope you slept well.”

“Good morning, Garthy. I slept very well, thank you. Do you have the time?”

“Almost noon, lovey,” they admitted, wincing a bit as they waited for her reaction. “You needed the rest, which was why I refused to let anyone wake you. Now, are you hungry? How about brunch, darling?”

“I think letting me sleep was most appropriate,” she answered softly, smiling to say that she appreciated the courtesy. “And I am hungry, actually. I wouldn’t mind brunch, if it’s not too much of a bother.”

“Never,” Garthy purred, kissing her forehead as they stood. “I’ll have that for you in just a moment. Here!”

They reached over to a fruit bowl and tossed her an orange. She caught it swiftly, placing the fruit on the table in front of her. She thanked Garthy as she watched them walk off into what must have been the kitchen. As she started to peel the orange, she heard a familiar voice in her mind.

_Hey Ayda! Fig is looking for you, said she needed to talk. Jawbone and Sandra Lynn also wanted to chat with Garthy. Is that okay?_

The orange nearly slipped from her fingertips. She was not expecting to receive a Sending spell from anyone but Rawlins, but the sound of her best friend Adaine wasn’t necessarily unpleasant. It was the message itself, however, that formed a knot in her stomach. She held off on her free response and waited for Garthy to return, slowly eating the orange.

When they did, it was with avocado toast and her favorite tea. She smiled uneasily and she knew Garthy could see right through her. Gently, they asked, “What happened, lovey?”

“Adaine gave me a message from a Figueroth saying she wanted to talk,” Ayda answered. “What should I do?”

Garthy shrugged, sitting beside her. “Now, unfortunately, I can’t help you with this one, sweetheart. It’s up to you if you’re ready to see her. No one would be upset if you said no. You don’t owe her anything that would be worth sacrificing your comfort.”

Ayda hesitated before she finally replied, “I think I’d like to hear what she has to say, even if it is to tell me she would no longer like to see me.”

Garthy frowned and murmured, “Somehow, I doubt that will be the case. Either way, I’ll be here if you’d like to talk to me afterwards.”

“Oh, Jawbone and Sandra Lynn would also like to speak with you. Should I invite all of them to the Gold Gardens? I would much prefer to have the conversation with Fig here, anyway.”

Garthy, who had taken a sip of their rum, choked rather clumsily when they heard that their old flame and his girlfriend wished to speak with them. Collecting themself rather quickly, they said in a high-pitched voice, “That’s fine. That’s unexpected, but fine. I’d be happy to see them.”

_Yes. Tell them they are welcome to come to the Gold Gardens._

She took the brunch prepared for her and studied Garthy’s face. There was such a mix of emotions at play there that she couldn’t even begin to guess what they were feeling. She didn’t keep that in her thoughts for long before simply sighing and sipping her tea. Instead, she focused on the things Figueroth might say to her, and what Ayda might have to say in response. Nothing was certain except that the thought of Fig leaving her made her want to weep. Still, she took a deep breath to steady herself.

“She’s not going to leave you,” Garthy insisted, a kind smile on their face. “And she’d be a fool if she did.”

Ayda didn’t answer that, since she heard her paramour’s voice in the distance disturbing the quiet of the early afternoon. She didn’t mind. If anything, her heart leapt in pure joy at the sound. Figueroth was always welcome to her, no matter what. She only hoped the fellow patrons weren’t too upset at the disturbance.

“Ayda!”

Ayda, bracing herself for the worst, turned at the sound of her name just in time to see Figueroth leaping to hug her. Stunned, she took an agonizing moment before reciprocating the embrace. The flame atop her head flared as the warm hug sparked happiness in her heart. It took her too long, however, to notice that Figueroth was fully weeping into her chest.

“Figueroth,” she rasped, suddenly feeling all too emotional. The sight of her girlfriend sobbing into her arms was enough for her to feel that all was forgiven. “It’s alright. You do not have to cry for me.”

“I hurt you,” she replied, muffled from the way her face was buried in Ayda’s vest. “You didn’t deserve that. No one deserved that, but especially not you. All you did was try to help, and I threw it in your face. I’m so sorry, Ayda.”

The phoenix girl felt the fiery tears spill from her eyes, but she held Figueroth back by the shoulders. The tiefling obliged with a nearly terrified expression, tears still streaming down her pink cheeks. Ayda knew that her paramour was clearly miserable, but she needed to be able to see her face when she apologized.

“I am not attempting to be cruel,” Ayda explained softly, taking one hand and cupping the other girl’s cheek. “But I have been duped by disingenuous apologies. If I may, I’d like to see your face when you apologize to me. It allows me to best judge your honesty.”

In a hushed whisper, Ayda cast Ayda’s Comprehend Subtext just to ensure she didn’t misconstrue anything her paramour said. She knew that the spell couldn’t unravel lies, but casting it felt like a safety net. The wizard could feel the spell in her mind, ready to help at any turn. Figueroth looked as though Ayda had physically wounded her.

“You don’t trust me?”

The spell echoed the true meaning in her mind, which was: _Have I really fucked up so much that the trust we’ve built up for so long is gone?_ Ayda visibly winced. This wasn’t a matter of trusting or not. This wasn’t even a matter of how deeply Figueroth had wronged her. This was just something she did. Expressions and physical movements helped her judge a person, just as it had helped her judge Figueroth’s intentions when her and the rest of the Bad Kids had walked into the library only months ago.

“I trust you, with all my heart,” Ayda murmured. “If it makes you uncomfortable, I will not ask you to apologize again. Perhaps that was unfair of me.”

Her paramour hesitated, but shook her head. “I owe you this much. You deserve to hear the truth. You deserve to feel loved. Ayda Aguefort, I am so sorry I didn’t make you feel loved. I’m sorry I drove you to run away from me. I know that you don’t look at people as projects. It’s just in the nature of a torch to light the way for those who are lost.”

_I love you, Ayda. You are such a force for good that your mere presence is helpful._

Ayda didn’t need to hear much else before leaning in to kiss Figueroth Faeth. Immediately, it felt that the hole in her heart had been filled. The feeling of being betrayed or attacked was long gone, and in its place was nothing but love. She kissed the tiefling girl until she could barely breathe before allowing Fig to slip from her grasp. Even then, Ayda held her close by the waist.

“I forgive you,” she confessed breathlessly, a small smile on her face. “And I missed you very much, Figueroth.”

“I missed you too, Ayda. I owe you an explanation,” Fig stated, tears still running down her face. “I was never angry at you, not once. I had no reason to yell at you. I just didn’t want to be anyone’s burden to bear and I didn’t want anyone worried for me. I’m trying to be better at asking for help.”

_I dismissed your help because I didn’t want to worry you, not because you had done something particularly bothersome._

“I see,” Ayda said, leading her over to a more secluded part of the Gold Gardens so they could continue this more privately. In her periphery, she saw Garthy blushing and smiling in a conversation with Sandra Lynn and Jawbone, which led her to believe they would be fine in her absence. “Perhaps, in the future, you should let me be the judge of what I can handle. Still, I can tell you that there will never be a moment in which I do not have time for you. You are my paramour, Figueroth. If you need me, there’s no shame in asking for my help. It is one of the many things I hold dear in our relationship.”

Ayda settled into a long booth, gesturing for Figueroth to join her. Rather than sitting beside her, however, her paramour laid flat on the bench and rested her head in Ayda’s lap. Almost immediately, the flame of her hair surged. She had missed being so close to Fig, even if it was only for a night. Leaving on those terms didn’t settle well with her. On instinct, she ran her fingers through her paramour’s hair with her nails lightly scratching her scalp.

“But would you tell me if I was overloading you,” Fig asked seriously. “I don’t want you to help me at the expense of paying less attention to the Compass Points Library. I know how much you love that place.”

_You shouldn’t have to give up what you love to take care of me. It’s not fair._

“And I am not prioritizing a mere place over you,” Ayda declared, almost offended. “You act as though I am trading something I adore for something I hate. Figueroth, when will you understand that I love you, and you are worthy of that?”

Fig didn’t answer that as a blush creeps onto her cheeks. Ayda could tell she had said something that has hit too close to the truth, and perhaps she had said it too aggressively. So, she added, “You can take the time you need to discover that truth. I will be here either way, so long as that is what you need and want.”

Fig’s grin was enough to tell her that she’d said the right thing. Still, it helped when her paramour added, “I love you so fucking much, babe. I will always want you around. Always.”

_Please don’t leave._

Ayda felt the spell’s context echo in her mind, and the pang of sorrow in her chest that followed it. She remembered when she was alone in moments that Garthy couldn’t protect her. Pirates scolded her for being too awkward and asking her why she hid herself away at the Compass Points like a recluse. Young Ayda both hated and longed for people. People were cruel, but at least she wouldn’t be alone.

And then she met Figueroth, and she realized that not everyone was out to hurt her.

“How fortunate it is that the feeling is mutual,” she quipped, leaning down to press a loving kiss to her paramour’s lips. When they parted, she was smiling. “I love you too.”

They stayed this way for a long moment with red irises staring, entranced by roiling balls of flickering flame. The time stretched between them, not awkward and unsure as if they didn’t know what to say to each other, but rather tender and comforting. Words didn’t need to be said for them to understand.

The moment was broken, however, by the howling and hollering on the other side of the Gold Gardens. Ayda at first thought that someone was being injured, but looked across the way to find that the noises were in celebration. Jawbone, Sandra Lynn, and Garthy had wide smiles on their faces and looked at each other with fondness. She was pleased to see her caretaker so elated, as they hadn’t been that way in a long while. Still, she couldn’t quite fathom what the celebration was for.

_The noises of celebration are caused by a newly-decided relationship, if one had to guess._

Just as the spell elaborated on that, Fig teased, “I guess love is in the air in Leviathan today.”

Ayda hummed, silently dismissing Ayda’s Comprehend Subtext. She wouldn’t have a need for that anymore. Kissing Fig’s face once again, she laughed as she purred, “I suppose it is, my darling paramour. I suppose it is.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading! I had a ton of fun working on this piece, especially since it's my longest one. Check me out on tumblr if you'd like! As always, kudos, comments, and constructive criticism are always welcome. Have a lovely day!


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